Grounded By You Read online

  Sam saw the confusion on her face and could guess what she was thinking. She wouldn’t have expected to see him in New York. He had even kept the fact that he transferred schools from Kate. He didn’t want anyone to know how pathetic he was that he had hoped in the back of his mind that some day this exact moment would happen if they were both in the same place again.

  “What are you doing here?” she asked.

  “Let’s go inside, and I’ll tell you,” Sam said. For a few moments, he had forgotten what was happening in his life, and it was nice. He was living on borrowed time now, and he knew it.

  “Sure,” Millie said. She cocked her head toward him. “I didn’t even know you were in the city.”

  Sam followed her through the door. His fingers itched to touch her again, especially as he watched the swish of her backside in the tight black skirt that she wore. Millie looked just as good as he remembered, even better. Having a woman who looked like a model as a close friend for the summer had been an exercise in torture, and he still didn’t understand why he was willing to subject himself to that again.

  “I’ve been here since right after Christmas,” he said. “I transferred to NYU for spring term.”

  He stood next to her in the elevator as it made its slow ascent to the fourteenth floor and shoved his hands deep into his pockets. He was aware that compared to the guy that she arrived with, he looked like a backwoods rube. Millie came from a wealthy family, and although she never acted as if she were better than him, there was no way he could compete with the kind of guy she was used to. He had always known that.

  “That’s terrific,” Millie said as she led him down the hall to her door. “You’re exactly where you need to be if you’re still thinking about pursuing that acting career.”

  Somehow he managed not to blurt his news out at that moment. As soon as he told Millie, their conversation would become all about that, and Sam wanted to know about her, and what she had been doing since he last saw her. He wanted to know about her senior year of college, and if she was relieved or scared to have graduated. A part of him definitely wanted to know if the guy he just met was her boyfriend. Most of all, he wanted to know if she was happy.

  “Sorry, the place is a disaster,” Millie said as they entered her apartment. “I just got back into town, and I’m still unpacking. I got lucky. A girl I went to prep school with is subletting it to me for a steal. It’s barely qualifies as a one-bedroom, but I love it.”

  Sam saw that, despite the small space, there was a bank of floor to ceiling windows that covered the far wall that offered a decent view of Midtown. “That’s what Kate said. Hopefully you don’t mind that she gave me your address. She wanted me to tell you hello.” It had felt good finally to confess to Kate that he was in New York. It had been the only way he felt comfortable asking Kate where Millie lived without it seeming weird.

  “I used to talk to Kate every day, and now the Willoughby takes all her time,” Millie said. Then she grinned. “What’s left goes to Reed, so I’ve moved way down the priority list. She’s probably delighted about the idea of offloading me and my neuroses to someone else.”

  Sam exchanged a knowing smile with her. He met Millie through Kate. At the time, Sam worked at the Willoughby Inn, which was the bed and breakfast owned by Kate’s aunt Patrice. Kate came to the Willoughby to help Patrice out that previous summer, and then Millie followed. When Patrice became ill, Millie helped Kate keep the inn running smoothly, and ended up staying all summer. Kate also met Reed, the man she eventually fell in love with. For a brief instant, Sam had been interested in Kate, but Kate only had eyes for Reed. It was the story of Sam’s life.

  When he first met Millie, he thought that she was interested in him. She flirted outrageously with him, but his insecurity made him cautious, especially after being burned by Kate. By the time that he got to know Millie better, and thought of returning the flirtation, something shifted. She was still warm and friendly toward him, and they spent every minute they weren’t working together, but it didn’t feel romantic. He kicked himself that he allowed the relationship to lapse into the friendship zone because he had been too much of a coward to take a chance.

  “They seem pretty settled,” Sam said. He turned his eyes back to the view. For as long as he could remember, other than making his dream of being an actor come true, a solid, long-term relationship with a woman he adored was the only thing that Sam aspired to in his life. His parents were about to celebrate their thirtieth wedding anniversary, and he thought they were more in love now than ever before. With that kind of example in front of him, day after day, he was never the guy interested in playing the field. He had been on the lookout for ‘The One’ since he was ten.

  Millie joined him in looking out the windows. He looked over at her and saw her wrap her arms around herself. There was something different about her that he couldn’t put his finger on yet. She seemed more reserved, which he couldn’t even believe he was thinking. Millie had a fire and wildness inside of her that he always envied. She was a risk-taker who always spoke her mind, and he appreciated that about her.

  “Good for her,” Millie said, bring his thoughts back to Kate and Reed. “You know, I couldn’t believe it when she said she was going to take the year off school. But I’ve never seen her so happy. It comes through in all her emails, and when I’m talking to her on the phone. Don’t ever tell her I told you this, but in a way I’m kind of jealous.”

  Sam was amazed how quickly they had fallen back into their old routine. He and Millie had talked for hours about life and their pasts and what they wanted to do with their future. It was because of Millie that Sam considered applying to NYU in the first place. She was one of the three people in the entire world who saw a low budget horror flick that he acted in during his freshman year of college, and she boosted his ego every time it came up.

  “You’ve got a gift, Sam. Don’t give up yet.” She said the same thing over and over to him the summer before, and somewhere along the way, she convinced him to believe in himself. He never would have made the switch otherwise.

  When he told her why he had gone through the trouble to seek her out, he hoped that she wouldn’t tell him that she had been blowing smoke up his ass. It was too late to stop the train he was on. Millie was the only person he felt he could trust to tell him the truth.

  It was surprising to hear her say that she was jealous of Kate and Reed’s life. Millie had also made certain that everyone around her knew that she had no interest in a relationship that lasted more than a few dates. She said it wasn’t her style. So he thought that her melancholy attitude had to be due to something else.

  “Are you finding that life isn’t as idyllic as it once was now that you’re out in the real world? I’m sure the fat job your dad’s been holding for you should sweeten the pot.” He kept his tone light and teasing. Although Millie didn’t beat around the bush that her family was loaded, she sometimes prickled when it came up in conversation.

  She collapsed onto the couch and patted the seat cushion next to her. He slid down onto the corner of the couch and turned to face her. She tucked her feet up under her and placed her cheek on the back of the seat. She looked younger than her twenty-three years.

  “My father is going to kill me,” she said. “I haven’t told him yet, but I’m not taking the job with his company.”

  Sam’s mouth fell open. “You were so excited about getting the opportunity to travel and live the dream of a life of corporate intrigue. What happened?”

  Millie looked pensive. “It’s not what I want to do anymore.” Then she stood up and made her way across the small room. Sam hadn’t noticed the draped canvases before that sat in front of her small bed. She pulled the cloth off of them one by one revealing the painted pictures. He wasn’t an art critic, but the pictures were stunning.

  “I got an appointment with a gallery owner, Evelyn Ward, who used to be good friends with my mom in a few weeks. I swore her to secrecy because the last thin
g I need is for this to get back to my mother, but I trust Evelyn’s opinion. I’m hoping that she’ll like my work and agree to a small show to at least test the waters and see if I could make a living doing this.”

  It was completely unexpected. Sam stood and walked closer to inspect each of the canvases in turn. Millie went into the kitchen and came back with two bottles of beer. She handed one to him. He sensed that she was waiting for his reaction.

  “I think these are really good,” he said, turning to her. He knew it was the right thing to say when her face lit up in a shy smile. “They’re amazing. You’re really talented. Why didn’t you tell me before that you painted? For as much time as we spent together last summer, you never mentioned it.”

  “It’s a recent thing,” Millie said. Her eyes returned to her work. “I can’t even explain it, but when I’m painting I feel relaxed and happy. There’s nowhere else I want to be in those moments. I just lose myself completely. I’m as surprised as anyone, but I feel it in my bones, Sam. I was meant to do this.”

  Sam understood that sentiment completely. It was how he felt about acting.

  They returned to the couch, and Millie drew her knees up to her chest. She looked more relaxed now, and Sam was glad. “Now you know my deep dark secret,” she said, taking a sip of her beer. “As soon as I tell my father, he’s going to try to bribe me to do what he wants. When I say no, he’ll probably say he’s going to stop paying my rent to twist my arm.”

  “What are you going to do then?” Sam took a swig of his beer. He had no way to relate to Millie’s financial situation, but he stopped being jealous of it shortly after he learned how many strings came attached to it. He thought that Millie handled herself well and still seemed to have some semblance of independence.

  “I’ll get a job,” Millie said. “What he doesn’t know is that I’ve been stashing away every dime he’s sent to me since last fall, and I have plenty tucked away to at least keep me afloat for awhile if I don’t go any crazy spending sprees. Then, if I can convince a gallery to let me have a show and I sell some of my work, I’m intending to pay it all back. I don’t want his money. Not anymore.”

  “Are you sure about that?” Sam asked. “Take it from somebody who’s had to work like five part-time jobs to pay for school, having a little help to get on your feet isn’t something to be taken lightly.”

  A frown crossed Millie’s face. “I can take care of myself. I am old enough to make my own money and make my own decisions. As long as I take money from my father, he isn’t going to respect that.”

  Millie told him many stories about her father over the summer. He could tell that even though James St. John threw money galore at his daughter, the only thing she really wanted from him was his time and attention. She described her mother as a plastic Barbie doll with no real emotions. The only family member that she ever spoke fondly of was her older brother.

  Sam held up his beer bottle. “Here’s to the wild and wacky world of finally being a grown-up.”

  Millie giggled and clinked his bottle. She took a long pull and then startled him when she reached over without warning and grabbed his bicep. “I notice that somebody’s been hitting the gym. Impressive.”

  His muscle twitched reflexively under her fingers, and her eyes widened. Sam wondered if she was looking at him in that moment like a friend, or something more, but then the expression on her face was gone. “It’s kind of a requirement for the acting thing,” he said. He downed the beer and put the bottle down, feeling anxious again.

  “Have you snagged any decent parts? Will I get to see you on Broadway someday?” Millie giggled again.

  It was the perfect opportunity to tell her. “I actually got a call today about a role I’m pretty excited about,” he said carefully.

  Millie sat up straighter and then scooted closer to him. “Really? Tell me all about it!”

  “Well, it was a complete fluke that I decided to audition for it at all,” Sam said slowly. “I’ve got so little film experience that I didn’t think there’d be anyway they’d consider me.”

  “So it’s a movie? Anything I would have heard of?” Millie started to bounce on the sofa cushion. Sam loved her like that, so attentive and open. She had always made him feel like he could do anything.

  “Funny you should say that.” Sam cleared his throat wondering how to say it just right. “I’m sure Kate told you that she got a call a few months ago from that executive producer in Hollywood who wanted to rent out the Willoughby for a few weeks.”

  Millie squealed and clapped her hands over her mouth. “You got a role in Where My Heart Breaks? I couldn’t believe it when I heard that they finally cut through the red tape with Walter Moolen’s estate and got the green light for the film adaptation. It’s going to be HUGE! That is so exciting!”

  “Yeah, I know,” Sam said. “It’s generated a lot of interest already.”

  “So what’s the part?”

  Sam took a deep breath. “Jackson Monroe.”

  Millie’s eyes widened, and she looked shocked. “Are you serious? You got cast as the lead?”

  Hearing it said out loud made Sam’s mouth run dry. “I know. It’s crazy, right? That they picked a complete unknown for the part? I’m having a hard time believing it myself.”

  Millie stood up and disappeared into the kitchen. She came back out with a magazine that he knew covered Hollywood gossip and news. She flipped open the cover and then shoved an article under his nose. “They’ve been speculating for weeks about who would be cast as Jackson. Like, everybody in the entire country is waiting to hear the news with bated breath. Sam, this will be massively huge when everyone finds out.”

  His stomach muscles tightened. He knew that any expectation he had of what was about to happen was probably woefully inadequate. “They told me that the press release goes out tomorrow morning.”

  Millie knelt down in front of him. Her face was serious. “I remember how many times you told me that if you could play any role, you’d want to play Jackson Monroe. This must be like a dream come true. I am thrilled for you, Sam. You’re going to be famous. You’ll be able to do whatever you want to do after this.”

  His thoughts were jumbled. He was terrified that, in less than twelve hours, his name would be splashed across every major news channel in the world. His life would change. He wasn’t naïve enough to think that everything would stay the same. But more than that, he was confused about the feelings resurfacing inside of him for the woman in front of him. He felt helpless to pull himself out of her orbit.

  “I could really use a friendly face in my corner over the next few weeks,” he said. He had practiced the words over and over again in front of the mirror earlier that day to make sure that his tone was casual and not at all desperate. “I leave for North Carolina to start shooting in three weeks, and could use some help rehearsing my lines. Plus we wouldn’t want my head to get too big.”

  “Hmm, hang out with a hot shot movie star? I could probably find some time to do that,” Millie grinned.

  “Great,” he said. Then he stood and helped her to her feet. He didn’t want to give her a chance to reconsider her decision. “How about tomorrow morning? I’m meeting my agent in the afternoon and then I have class. I wasn’t even thinking about it, but I’ll probably have to drop out until this is over.”

  “I’m supposed to have brunch with my mother, but I can push it out a couple of hours. I’m not in any hurry to see her. Here, give me your phone. I’ve got a new number.”

  He handed it to her, and Millie programmed her number into it. When she handed it back to him, their fingers brushed, and a wave of desire rippled through him. He was increasingly aware of the low cut blouse she wore that accentuated just the right amount of her tan skin. He wondered what it would be like to touch her there.

  Feeling his body start to respond to his thoughts, Sam knew he had to get out of there fast. He reached the door and turned to find Millie right behind him. There were only a few inche
s between them, and he saw a flush of crimson redden her cheeks. If he just leaned forward just a few inches, his lips would touch hers. Instead, he turned his face and brushed her temple with a soft, chaste kiss.

  “This is going to be a huge help. You’re going to keep me sane. Thanks, Millie. I’ll see you in the morning.” Then he left before he did something really stupid, like try to kiss her for real.

  CHAPTER THREE

  It was a restless night for Millie. She couldn’t stop thinking about those last few minutes before Sam bolted out the door as if someone was chasing him. The way that he looked at her made her wonder if there was something more to his request to hang out with him after the news broke.

  If she was honest with herself, Millie knew that Sam had harbored more than friendly feelings toward her. When they met, she initially started out flirting with him. It was standard protocol with every good-looking guy she met, and it had been completely superficial. But the more she got to know him, the more she realized that he was a truly great guy. Sam was the kind of guy that a girl could fall for and who would be there for her forever. Millie wasn’t that kind of girl who wanted that though. She had her hard and fast rule of no ties and no commitments. She didn’t have an interest in a relationship. So she did the only decent thing she could think of when it came to Sam. She toned the flirtation way down and became his friend. It should have simplified the situation, but instead it complicated it.

  Her thoughts turned back to the previous summer.

  It had happened two weeks before she was due to return to school. Millie and Sam went out to Lula’s, the only bar in the small town of Bleckerville to drink, dance, and have fun on a Saturday night. Sam’s high school buddies came out and that night the wife of one of Sam’s friends cornered her in the ladies room.